Sinus Melt Down

Mood: Struggling through.
Music: Hallelujah - Rufus Wainwright.
Yesterday was nothing out of the ordinary. It felt wierd not having a LOTF rehearsal though. Oh, and I won a cookie in R.S, but that was balanced out by being smashed in the eye with a football in P.E, lol. It didn't hurt much though, but I found it hilarious.
I'm going through a bit of a rough patch at the moment; I'm completely exhausted, and don't have the time to rest up. I'm usually a bit tired, in fact I can't remember a time where I wasn't.. But this level is just unhealthy. Tuesday night I pretty much crashed, Wednesday after the shakespeare essay I crashed again, last night no so much but still crashing and right now I'm feeling as if I'm gonna crash again. I dun like it. :(
Morning form I got there early and just put my head on desk to try and get some sleep. Thompson asked me if I was okay and I was just like I want shleeeeep so he laughed and went back on his computer. I asked to see him during break and he said okay, just because I needed like two seconds of his time. Then I went off to first lesson which was History. My fourth question of coursework is due in for the last day of term, and it's like a 1,200 word essay. Might do it over the weekend. History was okay, but Alistair got a bit annoying. Second was Physics, and Chris asked me to sit next to him so I abandoned Aran and Matt for him, and felt slightly bad when Matt did his sad face thing which is sooo cute. I like Chris though, he's just slightly more upbeat than most people. Break I tried to see Thompson but he wasn't there so the sixth formers kicked me out and I went to the library and just hung there. Miss Leedale is such an old bag; I genuinely hate her. Atleast she's given my book section to the new librarians though, so I don't have a section anymore. SCORE.
Biology was okay, just boring. We went through stuff on infections and how they spread and shit, how the body reacts and how vaccination works. Aran changed the words of the song 'Fascination' to 'Vaccination' which was pretty funny. Then he nicked Tubby's diary and wrote most of the song 'Hallelujah' in the back of it, which I then sang under my breath and it got stuck in my head. Thompson wasn't in his room at lunch either, and I the 'gang' wasn't in the quiet area so I gave in and went to choir. Tom and John were there, along with John's little brother Thomas who is (imo) an annoying snotbag. Tom mentioned Sam being depressed so I used that as an excuse to get out so that I could go find him so I could give him shnuggle time. He was in the library and it turned out he'd just lost his voice. Miss leedale being the old bag she is, me & Sam jumped ship of the library and spent lunch together. We promised each other heated sex at my house. Haha.
Afternoon form was alright. Thompson was like sorreh i was buseh. I stayed back after form instead and he got rid of Callum and Alistair. Alistair is just annoying, but he keeps pushing limits. He's really starting to collectively tick me and Thompson off. Callum is just dumb and wants to get Thompson 'on his side'. I don't mind Callum, but I do prefer to be alone with Thompson, I just don't get the chance anymore. We were never that close, but we were closer before. But he banished them and I finally got the chance.
It's his birthday sunday and like the suckup/friend I am I got him a tiny gift. It's not like one of those shitty impersonal things though, because he means a lot to me. I've yet to work out why, he means far too much. In summer, I went to Edinborough Comedy Festival (it was jokes) and I got each of the people I went to see to sign my program/ticket, minus Ed Byrne as he doesn't meet and greet. So I had this program with the autographs of: Stephen K Amos, Tim Minchin, Nicholas Parsons and Mark Wattson. When I told him about the festival in september he was dead jealous, so I gave him the program as the gift.
French wasn't as bad as it could have been, it's actually a lot better now. It's not depressing, it's just boring. I managed to stay focussed for most of it and I got a low B for my first bit of coursework, which I was happyface about. Physics part 2 was okay just boring because Mr. Matthews talks sooo much. After that I went to go talk to Thompson really quickly, he was Miss Knaggs and Callum who was like 'oh we should start a group.' I was like 'no. we shouldn't.' I guess I'm just jealous, I'm petty and matieralistic like that. Miss Knaggs was like 'You shud of brought him a present but I can't really talk cause I forgot too.' To me and Callum and me and sir looked at each other and smirked, but I didn't want to say anything in front of Callum. Then Thompson went back to his room to mark in some grades, Callum was staying with Knaggs so I went with Sir. We just talked about the weekend and stuff for a bit, and I knicked his phone, got it to his number, and slowly started to write it out (not intending to finish it, just to see his reaction) I got it half down before he noticed. I lol'ed. He moaned about having to do shit so I gave him a hug even if he didn't hug back. It felt good, haha. Then I realized I had stage coach and bolted home.
Stagecoach was okay but I sounded crap in singing cause of my cold; I sound crap normally but like... worse than normal.
Got home and pissed around a bit, before eating and writing this up. I've not had an opportunity to talk to Sam like, properly, recently. Lunch today... Well it was great and all, but I feel like he's a bit more confident over the computer or in actual private. It's just.. I've always got something on. I hope he knows how important he is to me. Or I will be sadface.
ILU SAM <3 teacher and my best friend. The best friend bit is all good. The teacher bit is sad. I wish he didn't mean as much to me, because... I don't mean much to him. It's depressing. Ugh I'm being obsessive. Someone slap me.